The end of the old year always leaves me with a nostalgic sadness..while the new year awaits me bright and shining and malleable. In the end, I feel inside like a wobbly, shiny malleable ball of playdough, hesitant to squeeze and destroy my last creation but full of ideas of how the new one can turn out. It doesn't help that Christmas is the best time of the year because we get to be home with my family and the New Year means it's back to lonely ole Las Vegas. But now that we've been back a few days I think I've come to terms with it.
Aaron's busy season has kicked off so it's Maddy and me around the apartment most of the time. Good thing we are such good friends, she's really getting fun to play with. It's VEGGIE time around here and here is the tally:
peas O carrots 3 Rice cereal 30
Something like that. Peas are out. Carrots are in!
And catching up on our winter hibernation..
Ahh too cute.
Delish Magazine has a wonderful feature on Anna Maria Horner, one of my fabric/artist/creator favs. In fact, peruse the entire online magazine because I found some great recipes and articles that can easily fill some of the empty afternoon hours you may have lying around. Or, if your bathroom needs cleaning and the dishwasher is calling your name (I'm not liistenniiing!) it's a great distraction to soothe a guilty conscience when work is calling your name and you just don't want to do it.
On Anna Maria's site itself she has some beautiful pictures and it always fills my creative bank.
Reading the article on Delish about how she started into the business, how she organizes that creative mind with the demands of a business I was surprised when she said mentioned the amount of time she spend sketching, scheming ideas was really low compared to what most people thought, and how much of what she does is "grunt work" and "not pretty".
I guess in my mind I envisioned her life as sketching, drawing, creating, sewing to her hearts content, people clamoring her to write books, go to craft shows and that life was just breezy and fulfilled because of the beauty she was surrounded by and the extraordinary talent she has. I'm always surprised to find out that my view through the window into other people's "ideal" lives is just that. A window looking into just one of their rooms but I miss the whole rest of the house..the exhaustion from being so busy, the stress, the worrying about problems we don't even know about, the struggles they have with looking at themselves in the mirror without seeing all they need to work on. I've realized (in my old 24 years of age) how much people really are alike. Everyone has problems they are plowing through (or ignoring). Even those who seemingly "have it all"don't. They put on a brave face. They emphasize the positive. And that's what we see. And if troubles don't bug 'em now, they will. At one time or another.
It makes me grateful for the life I have. For the troubles I face. For the strength of character I get to keep building as I get through one and jump into another. For those moments when Maddy is asleep on my lap and I feel pure joy.
Yes, the end of the year always saddens me but I can't help but look forward to the wonderful moments I get to live ahead. Bring it on!